*Antibody Boys: the phenomenon seems to be largely genderless, similar to f*ckboys
Cover image: GQ
Single men’s boasts on Bumble tend to be about height — it’s shocking how many Boston men are five-foot-eleven — or impressive but odd job combinations, such as doctor by day and DJ by night. Now there’s a new boast among these wanna-be-six-foot hustlers: “I’m vaccinated.”
“I don't know if saying your vaccination status is super serious. I think it’s just a fun little quirky thing to have in your bio,” said Cristian Maldonado, a Boston University student. “It really gives off skeevy energy.”
It makes sense, though. We are battling a pandemic that has killed over two and a half million people worldwide, so marketing yourself as vaccinated at least shows you care about others’ health. After months of getting dolled up for awkward facetime dates and sneaking out to have sex after moving back in with the parents, it’s a refreshing change.
“I think putting your vaccine status in your bio is pretty funny and I completely understand why you’d want to do that—once I get mine I am totally doing it too. I personally would be more inclined to meet up or hook up with someone who has the vaccine because not only are they more safe but their beliefs are more likely to line up with mine,” said Garrett Godber, an Arizona State student. “This weird new trend does a good job of weeding out those nasty anti-maskers and vaxxers. I’m here for it.”
For users on queer dating platforms, this evolution of health disclosures is nothing new. Scruff and Grindr have given users the option to reveal their HIV status for years, as well as whether or not they’re on PReP.
“On Grindr, for gays specifically, the big question is: do you have aids? Are you on medication to protect yourself? But now it’s like, do you have aids, and do you have COVID?” Maldonado said. “This vaccine is going to be a staple and will determine who you meet up with.”
It also gets you matches. In the words of OkCupid spokesman, Michael Kaye, getting the vaccine is “the hottest thing you could be doing on a dating app right now.” Kaye suggests that users who indicate they’ve been vaccinated end up getting ‘double the likes’ compared to users who say they’re not interested in having it. Sarah, a medical student at the University of Irvine who wishes to not use her last name for privacy reasons, has received both doses of the vaccine and confirms OkCupid’s findings.
“Not only did my Bumble matches skyrocket, but guys were actually messaging me back. Now that I am vaccinated, I can ditch the nurse roleplay and banging with a mask on. I can actually kiss people and not freak the f*ck out,” Sarah said.
When the first round of vaccines was being administered in the US in December, Bumble said it’s seen “a steady increase in the number of people who have included the word ‘vaccine’ or ‘vaccinated’” on their profiles.
On Tinder, ‘antibody boys’ are no longer top-of-the-market, as more and more people, like Sarah, declare their COVID-immunity prestige. The app reported a 238 percent increase in vaccine mentions between last November and December, including things like “im #covidvaccinated anyone up for an adventure?” and “I have antibodies for COVID-19 but I’m still afraid of catching feelings.”
But not every antibody boy or vaccine bro is as medically literate as they claim. While antibodies might turn some into COVID-immunity superstars, their time in the limelight only lasts for so long. A lot more research needs to be done to tell how long antibody protection lasts or whether someone can still carry and transmit the virus even if they’ve had it before.
“I got antibodies and a green badge that shows I am clear from ‘Rona. I feel like a superhero,” said Sam Orlov, a recent Bumble match and Boston University student who regularly flexes his antibody status as a fuckability factor. “When are you free? I want to show you my badge so you can see I am not bs-ing you.” Orlov agreed to have his text message in the article.
Not to mention, there are actual concerns about the wider implications of introducing a “vaccine-classified” system. Maldonado explains that dividing app users into different groups depending on their antibody or vaccine status could potentially create a COVID class system.
“A lot of these kids getting vaccinated are in the bio-field and aren’t even in hospitals or in the front lines. This [vaccine privilege] is excluding a whole group of people from participating in hookup culture and the dating scene,” Maldonado said.
And not everyone will have access to the vaccine, especially marginalized communities. One study found that Black people are significantly less likely to be vaccinated than white people, despite being a more at-risk group. Making this information the centerpiece of your dating profile isn’t the classiest way to make your move, Godber says.
“I think who’s getting the vaccine first is the issue,” Maldonado said. “The ones who do have it are not a priority. You see a 20-year-old elite, white Jake who was vaccinated but not a Black elderly person who actually needs it and can’t get it.”
If you’re marketing yourself as vaccinated on dating platforms in hopes of persuading someone to go Mask Off with you, it may not be the flex you think it is. Wait to shoot your shot until everyone else has had theirs and instead try complimenting her in the most 2021 way possible: you smell so good, is that Purell you’re wearing?
Comments